Like a Matador
by PorcupineWeirdo
Summary: Ah, it seems the Strawhats have stumbled across another island. What shenanigans will they find here? Only time will tell, I'm afraid. LuNa, slight ZoRo, but no real focus on romance.


AN: Thank god I don't own One Piece because I would ruin it. A lot of LuNa, a little ZoRo, I'll try not to focus only on the pairings to much. There will likely be a lot of fluff though, just because. Rated T for language and maybe some other stuff.

* * *

**Like a Matador**

Chapter Один

Waves crashed against the side of the _Thousand Sunny_ as the ship steadily rode through the sea. Sounds of laughter and yelling could be heard coming from it. If one were to look upon the rather large vessel, he would be able to see a group of 9 people scattered across the grassy decks. If he looked closer, he would find that these people were pirates, the Straw Hat Pirates, to be exact.

Monkey D. Luffy, brave and honorable captain of the ship, was shouting out orders to his trusted crew, receiving a few awed looks coming from his younger nakama. One woman on the crew was clutching her heart, gazing at him with a dazed look in her eyes--

I'm sorry, who were we talking about? I got my facts mixed up there for a second. Let's get back on track.

Monkey D. Luffy, idiotic and goofy captain of the ship, called out to get him some meat, receiving an annoyed look from the cook on board, Sanji. One woman glanced up at him from her newspaper, vexed. "We've had no meat on board for a day now. Shut up, before I throw you overboard!" You'd think the captain would punish his crew for acting so disrespectful. Alas, not aboard the _Thousand Sunny_, where insults were thrown to the captain daily, with no punishment.

Dear reader, where you expecting a fearsome captain who slaughters hundreds, no, thousands of innocents weekly? Where you hoping to feel a tingle in your spine as you read about the striking adventures of Captain Luffy, terror of the sea? Well, I hope not, for you shall likely be reading about someone a tad different. If you _are _interested in that genre, please go on next door to read the tales of Captain Usopp, and you might find something more to your tastes.

Now, let us continue. The day passed uneventfully, much to the chagrin of energetic Luffy. As night fell upon the crew, a small island came into view. Roronoa Zoro, swordsmen of the crew, happened to be on watch at the time. Unfortunately, he had a habit of falling asleep when he was on night watch. Navigator Nami, a rather smart young lady, knew this and decided to join him in his duties. She had been expecting the island to appear for quite some time now.

Normally, Nami would use the speaker system to tell the crew about the island. For some reason, she hesitated as she reached for the intercom. Usually islands appeared when the crew was awake, never when they were sleeping. With the strain of the crew's battle at Thriller Bark a few days ago, Nami understood how worn out they were, despite their easy-going attitude. Deciding to wait until morning to show everyone the island, Nami crept back into the girl's bedroom, dreading the chaotic morning tomorrow was to bring. ~

A soft smile formed on Nico Robin's lips as she stepped out of the bedroom and into the sun. Sparing a glace at the tiny island the ship was closing in on, Robin stretched her arms and went to wake up Zoro.

"Swordsman-san, it appears we're approaching an island." Zoro responded by pulling his swords closer and grunting. Robin chuckled and pushed him further.

"Cook-san is going to go ahead and see if the island is safe. He doesn't want anyone getting hurt." This caused the man to shoot up with a competitive look in his eyes.

"Stupid love-Cook, I don't need protection!" Zoro yelled as he climbed out of the crow's nest. Robin smirked as Zoro realized that Sanji was still sleeping. The swordsman glared at her, muttering something about evil women. While this was happening, Luffy and Usopp, the sharpshooter who could take down Sea Kings with the blink of an eye, woke up.

"Suge! An island! Let's go! Adventure!" These words echoed throughout the _Sunny, _waking up the rest of the crew. Brook was the first to show himself.

"Yohohoho!~ I see an island! Even though I have no eyes!" Receiving a knock on the skull (yoho) from Zoro, Brook merrily danced over to Luffy and Usopp as they gossiped ideas of the island. Nami came on deck looking very tired, as if she had stayed up late last night. She nodded at Robin, managed to glare at the noise the crew was making (how does one glare at sound?), and waited for the ship to get closer near land..

Sanji happened to come out just then. "Nami-swan! Robin-chwan! How would you like my special Love-Love Fruity Chocolate Cake Love Breakfast!?!"

"A coffee will do just fine, cook-san."

"Un, nothing for me, Sanji-kun."

Looking slightly disappointed, Sanji made way to the kitchen. Franky and Chopper were the last to appear, arguing whether money should be spent on cola or medical supplies.

"We need the cola to power the ship, what if we get into a bad situation and need a Coup de Burst, but are out of cola?"

"But we need medicine if someone gets hurt! Robin, what do you think?"

"Oi, don't answer that, Ncio Robin. This is our discussion!"

At that moment in time, two great fists slammed against the heads of Chopper and Franky. Yes, Nami didn't have much patience today, for whatever reason.

"Anchor the ship and get on the damn island." Hmm, what's her problem?

Despite Nami's attitude for that day, the Straw Hat Pirates had a great time exploring the island. It was a spring island, so the day was nice and warm. There was a tiny village living right in the middle of the island. It took about 20 minutes to find, because the island had a mere 9 mile diameter. Usopp, Luffy, and Chopper took off automatically in the village; Usopp because he thought it was the safest place to be, Luffy because he wanted an adventure, and Chopper because he wanted to find a bookstore. This island was actually quite famous for it's literature, despite the small population. The island's name was Scorall, not to be confused with squirrel. If only people could be more original with their names. Sigh.~

Robin walked through the town, not really knowing what she was looking for. There wasn't much to see in here, mostly taverms and markets. The town was surrounded by a forest inhabited with hedgehogs, mosquitoes, and a donkey every then and now. Nobody really knew why those were the only animals living there, but the villagers figured it was the evil spirits, and left it at that.. They got most of their meat from trade ships, so the lack of meat didn't matter. Anyway, Robin spotted a store—tiny, like everything else—that seemed promising. Robin pushed a hair behind her ear as she hauled open the rusty door, a little bell ringing to notify the store-owner she had arrived.

The store was cramped and uncomfortable. The ceiling was low and Robin had to crouch a little to avoid hitting her head. A musky scent filled the air, and a few mosquitoes were buzzing around. An old man was sitting behind a counter, seemingly asleep. There were rows of shelves tightly pressed together, and lining the walls. Covering the shelves were hundreds of books gathering dust. Cobwebs were filling up a few corners. Robin would have thought the man was dead, if not for the soft snoring emitting from him.

Ignoring him, Robin approached the closest shelf, silently browsing through the selections. One book caught her attention—The Tale of Pinky in the Exotic Forest. It was a children's book, clearly. There was a drawing of mouse wearing overalls on the cover. Robin chuckled, it had been a while since she'd read a fairy tale. Since joining the Strawhat crew, she'd loosened up a bit. Robin wasn't the least bit embarrassed to sit in the stiff cushion chair, flip open The Tale of Pinky in the Exotic Forest, and begin to read.~

Sanji walked through the market, searching for a good place to stock up on food—meat, specifically. The town reeked of rotten food and shit, as though it were a medieval town. Judging by the villagers clothes, it might as well have been. Sanji, deciding it'd be a good idea to get out of there as quickly as possible, saw a meat stand that wasn't reeking quite as much as everything else, and walked over.

"I'll take 50 pounds of steak, 50 drumsticks, and 25 of your best ribs," Sanji absentmindedly told the clerk.

"Ye must be makin' a sacrifice to ye gods!" he replied in a scratchy voice, taking out the desired amount.

"No, I just need to feed my friend. How much will this cost?" the cook said, a bit weirded out by the man's tone of voice.

"Ah! No man must eat like a god!"

"Sorry?"

"Ye friend be filled with evil spirits! No man must eat like a god! No man must eat like a god!" Sanji was getting freaked out.

"Right, thanks for the meat." Sanji grabbed his food, threw some Beli on the counter, and got out of there as quickly as he could. He could still hear the faint cries of 'No man must eat like a god!' what ever that meant. Hauling the meat over his shoulder, Sanji set out to the ship, determined to get out of there.~

Nami was feeling very self conscious. All the women around her were wearing long skirts and showing little skin. Nami wrapped her arms around herself and walked a bit faster. She hoped there would be a navigation shop close by. After finding out when the log pose would set, the crew and her would get out of the strange town as soon as they could.

Nami had been walking for a half hour and hadn't seen a navigation shop yet. Villagers were beginning to give her glares, and she was beginning to get desperate. _How hard can it be to find something in a town this small? _Nami stopped. Hadn't she seen that shop before? This road was definitely familiar. She had walked through the entire town without finding a map shop, or anything similar. Walking over to a balding man, Nami nervously asked him, "How long does it take for the log pose to set?"

He looked at her, confused. She showed him her wrist.

"The log pose, how long till it sets to the next island?" He seemed to understand.

"You-you're a t-t-traveler, eh?" The man stuttered in an Austrian accent, shaking as if he had the plague.

"Yeah, I am," Nami countered impatiently. The man shuddered, then grinned a hyena grin. He had rotten yellow teeth and breath that made Nami step back. With a maniacal look in his eyes, the man snickered at her.

"You ain't gettin' off this island, young m-missy," he all but shrieked, causing the towns-folk to stare. Nami looked at him, disgusted. She quickly turned tail and ran away from the man who was chuckling under his breath. Nami didn't look back as she jogged to the ship.~

Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper were discussing politics when they saw Nami running off in an alleyway. The three looked at each other, shrugged, and continued debating whether the World Government was properly running the world. It was a while before Luffy recommended they find out why Nami was running. Usopp figured she had seen someone with a bag of money, and Chopper agreed with everything he said, so Luffy just shrugged it off.

Usopp was stating his opinion of Sengoku with some strong words, when Luffy spotted a meat stand and ran to it. The ossan who ran the shop was muttering something about a man that ate gods for lunch. Luffy thought that eating a god would be icky, because there'd be too much earlobe. Usopp and Chopper came over, to find Luffy chewing on a stale piece of meat. The owner of the meat stand finally snapped out of his...state.

"Ah! Racoons are illegal! You have no right! Out, out!" Chopper switched to his Heavy Point and grew red with fury.

"I'm a reindeer, goddammit! I kill you!"

"Ossan, your meat is awful," Luffy complained, spitting out some rotten meat.

"Oi, Chopper, calm down!" Usopp panicked.

"Avert thy adversary elsewhere!" The man cried, in reference to the raccoon, for racoons were illegal on this island.

"Hmm...ossan, you make no sense and your meat is abominable. I'm going to find Sanji." With that, Luffy turned away and left for the ship, leaving Chopper and Usopp to torture the poor salesman.~

Franky chugged some cola as he and Brook stepped over a pile of horse dung. The village they were stopping in was absolutely vile. Franky's metal nose felt like it was about to fall off, and he worried that the smell would rot the ship. Brook, however, seemed to not mind the smell. Perhaps it was from spending so much time on Thriller Bark—zombies didn't exactly have a pleasant scent; more likely the reason was that, being dead, Brook had no nose and therefore could not smell.

"This island isn't super at all!" Franky complained, covering his nose with his hand.

"It is a rather morbid place," Brook politely replied.

"Do you see any places that might sell cola? I'm running pretty low," Franky asked.

"I haven't seen anything yet, but I'll look out for one." The two Straw Hats were silent as they walked through town, bored.

"Is someone guarding the ship?" Franky suddenly asked after several minutes.

"Zoro stayed behind, if I recall correctly." Brook and Franky looked at each other, then briskly headed back to the ship, walking a tad faster than before. It wasn't long before they reached the outer edge of the town, and went into the bordering forest. The only way to get to the civilization was through the woods, so they were following a path made previously by people. Now, few in the small pirate crew had any sense of direction. Nami, being the navigator, had a wonderful understanding of getting from point A to point B without getting lost. Robin had enough sense to avoid getting lost. Brook and Franky weren't amazing, but they manage to get where they need to go. It was Luffy and Zoro who had the biggest problems with direction. So how, dear reader, did our cyborg and skeleton manage to find themselves on a cliff over looking the sea with the ship nowhere in sight?

Brook was sipping a cup of tea (where did he get that?) and Franky was rubbing his chin.

"If we get onto the beach, we can just walk around until we find the ship. It's a small island, so it shouldn't take too long," Franky suggested. Brook agreed, and the two were on their way.~

"Oi, Nami! Do you know where Sanji is?" Luffy called up to Nami, as he closed in on the _Thousand Sunny._

"Oh, Luffy! He was here just a moment ago. Went to find Robin," Nami yelled back. Luffy hopped aboard and squatted on the railing.

"Ah. Is there any food?"

"Well, he left a big pile of meat, but it's not cooked--" Nami's eye twitched, as Luffy had left at 'pile of meat'. She headed into the kitchen and got some water. Luffy was quite disappointed in the lack of cooked meat.

"Wasn't Zoro staying behind? Where is he?" Luffy asked.

"The idiot left the ship unguarded. Probably finding some place to train," Nami grumbled.

"Nami, why are you so grumpy toda--" Luffy began, though the orange-haired girl's fist quickly silenced him.

"I'm not being grumpy!" She whined.

"Nami! What was that for?" Luffy complained, rubbing the bump on his head. Nami was so unhappy today. Luffy didn't like it when his nakama was unhappy. She probably needed some meat.

"Hey Nami, do you want some meat?"

"I ate less than an hour ago."

"I know, you must be hungry! You hardly eat anything at dinner," Luffy replied wisely.

"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU STEAL ALL THE FOOD!!!" Nami yelled in Harry Potter's capslock of rage.

"Nami, your capslock of rage is hurting my ears." And then the reader rolled his or her eyes, and the author mumbled something about attempts at humor. After another bump on the head, Luffy opted for silence.

"So I guess it's just you and me on board," Nami moaned. How she wished for Robin, or, hell, anyone, to be there at that time. It was just so awkward, when it really shouldn't be. Maybe Nami should have been a bit kinder, because this awkwardness shouldn't be present with nakama.

"Hey, Nami!"

"What?"

"Do you want to go on an adventure?"

"No!" Nami sighed.

"Aww, but why not?"

"Just because!"

"But there might be treasure!"

"How would you know that?"

"All adventures have treasure in the end!"

"Yeah, I wish," Nami mumbled.

"But it's so boring staying on the ship!"

"Then go find Usopp or Chopper."

"But then you would be all alone." A smile twitched at Nami's lips at the thought of him caring that much for her. Perhaps it would be a good idea to leave the ship for a while. Not to mention the treasure...

"What kind of adventure do you have in mind?"

"Why, a pirate's adventure of course!"

"Of course." Nami felt like an idiot for expecting to get an answer out of Luffy.

"Let's go!" So Luffy and Nami set off through the woods, ready to discover some treasure. Or was it adventure? These things just keep slipping my mind.  


* * *

And there you have it, I shall update soon no matter whether I get 1 or 100 reviews, good or bad. And for the record, I do hope you enjoyed the story. Oh, and also, a very very unbirthday to you. Unless of course it is your birthday, in which case happy birthday to you. Have some tea.


End file.
